When two people are dating we often hear about their puppy love, tiffs, both big and small but the moment they get into a serious relationship, we barely get to know what’s really going on in their life. We help you get an insight into the secret of modern marriages!
The unspoken pressure on married couples to present a happy, healthy relationship to the outer world doesn’t let anyone get a peek inside their real world. Admitting that you are unhappy can be seen as failure so people prefer to keep such details to themselves. Also, as soon as we experience a lull in our sex life, we assume that everyone else must be having more sex than we are. We found out five common issues that all married couples face…
Sex can be boring, occasionally
True, sex can occasionally be messy, painful, boring and unwanted. Shares HR consultant Deepika Kapur, “The first time we had boring sex, I was left shaken. I thought our chemistry was over and now our sack sessions would never be good again. But I soon got over the fear. Our next sack session was one of the best that we ever had.”
One partner is always left craving
No two people in a marriage have the same libido. One is always left craving for sex. Modern life has also given way to new sexual pressures and expectations that can not always be met. Says consultant Hemant Sinha, “I have always had a high sex drive. My wife and I have fantabulous sex but there are many times when I am craving for it and she’s not in a mood.”
Sex drive disappears once in a while
The reality is that a large number of couples experience sexual difficulties at some point of time in their marriage. This is when their sex drive drops. Suggest sex therapist Payal Kapoor, “Instead of thinking how badly it reflects your feelings for the partner, concentrate on bigger issues that are making you feel disinterested in sex.” Payal goes on to add, “Sometimes separate beds can reignite the spark! It has helped many couples I have known. It breaks the monotony and makes them long for each other.”
Sexually unfaithful thoughts are common
Some people need constant reminders of how desirable and sexy they still look. When that doesn’t happen, they look for admiration outside. And having sexually unfaithful thoughts are common. Someone rightly said, ‘Sex pulls you away but love gets you back!’ Adds psychologist Seema Hingorani, “It is human tendency to feel wanted. And when couples don’t get it in their marriage, they seek it outside and such thoughts are common.”
Incessant fights are normal
You often wonder seeing a happy couple around you how they manage to be so in love, while you pull the trigger almost every second day. Do not feel guilty thinking you are the only one who does it. All couples fight, and this is the rule!