The world of romantic comedies and love stories has really ruined the kiss for normal men. Women tend to forget that actors spend countless hours learning how to be the perfect on screen kissers. Because of these breathtaking moments in their favorite shows and movies, women look for this in real life. Girls want to feel like their world is stopping with every kiss. Mind you, this emotion is created in movies through the help of scenery, sound effects and a juicy plot that toys with a woman’s heart strings. As a man, it’s your job to understand what female expectations are and how to cater to them in your own way without trying to be someone you are not. Again, kissing is an art form – but every artist has a different style.
Expectation 1: Men are Very Romantic
If you have ever suffered through P.S. I Love You, The Notebook or any other popular love story, then you know that there are some really lofty expectations presented in these movies. Even woman who will not admit it secretly hope that the random dude they met on the elevator is going to wisk her away to an overseas restaurant on a whim and propose atop the Eiffel tower. In reality, it is really no different than the way men secretly wish that their soul mate will mount a stripper pole in the bedroom and dance around the house in lingerie on a regular basis. The difference is that men are visual creatures while women are emotional.
Within reason, chances are you are NOT the overly romantic type. First of all, that is OK. Relationships are about finding the person that compliments you and who you are, not about attempting to change everything about yourself to be someone you are not. Small details can make a moment romantic in the eyes of a woman. For example, we already discussed the power of a kiss on the forehead. Implementing one of these during a moment where you are both content and surrounded by loving emotions can have substantial romantic power. When you think about kissing a girl, think of how you can bring the most to that particular moment. It does not matter where it is, girls like to be kissed. Kissing a girl for no reason at all IS romantic. When she asks “What was that for?” you can reply with something as simple as “Just because I wanted to.” Simple actions are more romantic than huge over-publicized gestures. If you need a movie example to help you along – in the movie Sweet Home Alabama, the girl says “Why do you want to marry me anyways?” and the boys says “So I can kiss you whenever I want.”
Expectation 2: All Men Know How to Kiss Amazingly
Men may hold the power to be a great kisser, but that doesn’t mean that all of them kiss amazingly. Again, chalk this idea up to the unrealistic expectations presented by Hollywood. If no one has ever told you otherwise, then you probably think you are a great kisser. But this may not be the case. Watch a woman’s body language when you are kissing her. If she seems to want more, then you are likely a great kisser. If she seems hesitant, then there is probably room for improvement.
The best thing you can do to help meet her expectations and show that you care is simply ask a girl what she likes in a kiss. It could be as simple as where you place your hands on her body to how you touch her hair to the type of kiss you give. Whatever it is, you can alleviate the stress of not being good enough in your head by asking a girl how to be a better kisser for her.
Expectation 3: Great Kissing Means Great in Bed
If there was ever a standard that could kiss a romance, it would be this one. There are tons of these little statements out there that women believe whole heartedly. Being a great kisser means you will be great in bed. Of course, this is hardly the case. Some men are natural born great kissers, some are terrible but end up being great in bed and some are just sub-suck all around. Men tend to get nervous about kissing a girl for the first time. This is the first real intimate encounter that most couples experience and therefore it can be intimidating.
Before that first kiss, remind yourself that your goal is to debunk her expectations and give her new ones. In fact, movie expectations may seem lofty, but it is only because the feelings that a girl gets when she watches those movies remind her of a past love. You want to be the guy that ruins her for all other guys with your kissing skills!
Expectation 4: Her Heart will Stop Beating With Your Kiss
Girls want and need to feel like their whole world has just been turned upside down by your kiss. Is this possible? Yes. While it is an expectation they have, you can actually learn how to do this effectively. By mastering your kissing technique you can create the feelings and emotions she wants to experience in every kiss. She will literally feel like her heart has stopped beating.